My image of God creates me *

One of the most pivotal things to consider and explore in any journey of faith and spirituality is one's image or theology of God. This is the heart of my spiritual quest, as both one who seeks and accompanies other seekers along the path. The word theology means ‘the study of God’; theo = God (the subject) and ology = the study of (the subject). A theologian therefore is one who has made God the subject of their study.

Words are powerful, packed with depth of meaning and invitations for discovery. The study of God does not require a university degree, or even a 10 week discipleship course whereby everything you need to know in order to put God in a tidy box will be revealed. On the contrary, unless you see yourself as one who desires to teach others about said subject (or at least give your opinion), the study of God requires boots on the ground and a pilgrimage through a life fraught with a multitude of experiences, the good, the bad, the indifferent, the ugly, with hopefully some wise guides along the way. 

Further to the conversation is the associated concept of ‘knowledge’ and this never ending thirst to know what we think, or what we think we know, which according to 17th century philosopher Renee Dēscart was the pinnacle meaning of what it was to be human, elevating head knowledge above all other ways of knowing; ‘

I think, therefore I am.

Since that time others have come up with different ways of explaining what it means to be human and all of the intricate design features that combine to make us who we are, are being embraced, thankfully.

But how do we know who God is? What image of God do you have that holds you as an anchor in a world that is anything but calm sailing. Does it matter to your formation as a human? Does it matter to the World around you? Do you even use the word God to describe your connection to the Divine?

My first religious guide, back in the 70’s was an Anglican Priest who gave me a glimpse as a young person into the breadth and scope of human possibility, not by anything (that I can remember anyway) that he said, rather by what he did. To borrow a popular phrase he was ‘progressive’, and well before his time. I cannot recall a moment where I was not invited and free to join all of the facets of faith community life. I didn’t experience one moment where I didn’t feel girls couldn’t play. Of course because my experience was such, I didn’t actually realise that this was not always the way it worked for girls, or women in church, and also in much of societal life. Up until that time my image of God was being inadvertently formed from a display of inclusivity offered by a Priest. God was still languaged as a ‘he’, but I don’t think I thought God was a man.

Jumping ahead into my 20’s I had a polar opposite experience where I was told, (once again by a Church leader) in no uncertain terms to take a seat, to view my strong opinionated self as somewhat rebellious in need of a lesson in submission to God, who of course, was also being imaged in the body of a man. Once again I didn’t find myself asking the questions as to whether God was male or not, rather intuitively I knew something was amiss, but I distracted and buried myself in doing what I loved and felt good at which at the time was being a mother and raising girls:) What an opportunity! The stage was being set.

Why have I offered this small glimpse into my personal history?

I believe that my image of God shapes everything I do. The confronting statement coined by contemporary feminist theologian Mary Daly, ‘If God is male, male is God’* hit me like a lightbulb in my 40’s, and is one that I have allowed to crystallise the sacred nature of my design as a woman, enabling me to find the presence of the divine feminine within. Humans seem to be the only creatures that struggle to live out of their inherent design and we are still figuring that one out. A bird is a bird is a bird. It doesn’t wake up and question, ‘who am I’ or  ‘what will I do with the rest of my life’? Rather it just sings, some kind of celebratory hymn to the Universe, to the rising sun, to the dawn. It doesn’t strive, rather it falls headlong naturally into its unique way of being. 

I know life is not as simple as rising with the sun and singing through the day. But it’s also not as complex as we have made it out to be. Whatever my image of God is, I must also be able to recognise God in the world around me, in all creation, and in human bodies. God must be embodied.

And this is where I’ve landed for now. An embodied spirituality invites me to recover  and experience the sacred in both my own body, as a woman, and also in all bodies of creation. And in doing so my image of God is expanded to include and transcend that which has been presented in a largely anthropocentric and primarily masculine frame. It also invites a way of being with the natural world that calls for deep respect and care, challenging and altering my way of engaging with all other life residing on and sharing with our sacred Mother-Earth home. To borrow a phrase from Fr Richard Rohr *

 ‘my image of God creates me’ 

The way I see and experience God informs the way I see and experience myself, others and the world around me. It starts within, looking a little deeper into myself to find the original essence or goodness that is calling me to wake up and be the human I was designed to be. This makes life somehow easier. I can start my day in silence, listening to that dawn chorus of birds, maybe even trying to sing along, (although that is one of the most difficult things to do, and I have tried) No, I’ll just leave the birds to be birds, enjoy their uniqueness and I will endeavour to be human, and the best version I can be.